I know

What am I
and
What have I become?

I ask these questions
once in a while…

whenever I feel like running
from what I need to do.

whenever i feel the burden
and the fear returning…

and I tell you,
it keeps returning!

I never got the answers…
but …
i am here.
and ..
you know!

Some life

Stop!
Don’t judge me yet.
I weep in words,
The tear-circus is out of town,
Its been too long.
And would you notice?
that,
I bleed for relief,
from patches of happiness and sorrow, and
search for darkness,
in this emotional de-light.

I believe in the fate that
has been constructed for me –
walls and closed doors,
and bewitched eyes.
Green is as green as that paint on the wall,
pain is as painful as eye can see and hear.
But wait,
don’t judge me yet!
To lose is one thing,
to give up is one thing,
being hopeless is another,
to die doesn’t matter… but …
To come to a world that –
greets you with expectations,
breeds you to be useful,
feeds you with emotions,
tames you with greed –
… and … To carve your own way
through this desert
and not leave a trace,
that would be some life!
Now!

Fields of snow

Every tree, green and yellow
are now
grayed out by the snow.
the hills have suddenly
grown older –
look wiser.
Watching the fields, with seeds of life –
lying underneath –
awaiting patiently
for their turn to rise
with the sun,
gives me a strange sense of relief.

I look at them from within
a running van.
My mind races faster
My heart, sometimes
skipping a beat.
An anticipated defeat.
But then, I bear a calm face.

The snow covered fields
give me comfort,
not joy – just comfort.
and with every spin of the wheels
I feel closer to them.

Forever can’t be

Forever can’t be
never, ask me,
clever – i am, not.

graver made
the frost
to rust, so…
it melt into
          red

water,
that washed
away – our trust.

now i sit here
watching, … what …

b   u   d      u     t     g    t      e
   o   n        s       o    e     h     r

create a river

b e t w e e n                          u s.

and … i see no boat;
i see no bridge.

just forever, ahead of me

but… it just can’t be
never, ask me
though –

clever I am, not!

Just a thought

what goes in must come out

what is done shall be undone

every thing that happens

every fuckin event

is just another form of energy

constantly changing itself

and as is said

can never be created,

nor destroyed

So if u r happy all the time

u’d want to be sad

and if u’r sad all the time

u’r doomed to get mad

there’s nothing better

nothing worse

there’s a world in madness itself…

its just that we’re afraid to explore…

Resurrection II

Resurrection

 

I stand alone
weathered, dust and bones;
death has long gone
and life is yet to come.
Broken veins standing out,
piercing me deep
yet i feel no pain;
resurrection – it seems but a long rest,
a bait!
Yet i’m not tired to wait;
what else has a dead wood to do,
but wait?

If you find me beautiful,
so i am.
Put me in your doorway,
polish me green,
let me be seen!
I will look at you when I open my eyes again.

Woody Craftsman – Truth

Truth is the devil, that lurks behind our lies.

What would you do to prove that you’re right?

well, i…
i’d find all the holes in you
make some more if i have to
to pour it inside you!

i’d shout, at the top of my voice
or give you a gaze through a pair of icy cold eyes
the kinda one that sends chills down your spine
until you become ready to take it in
until you beg for the warmth of words,

then i’d give it to you
bit by bit – the truth.

All this, if you vex me
If not, all you get is a smile
or a pat on your back:
“Everyone gets a version of truth;
you’ll get it someday”…

Like … death
It’s a truth, ain’t it?